Online Personality Quizzes

[melannen]

I have been spending today thinking about the scenario of "What if my favorite characters took online 'who are you' personality quizzes based on people in their universe?"

It started with Vorkosigan, for which we decided that Emperor Gregor never, ever gets Emperor Gregor in "Which Barrayaran Emperor Are You?" quizzes. (Ivan Vorpatril always gets Emperor Gregor. Miles is incapable of taking one without deliberately manipulating the answers to his advantage, even if he tries not to.)

Meanwhile, Poe Dameron always gets Leia in "Which Hero Of the Rebellion Are You" quizzes. Even if he has to get BB-8 to slice in and change the results. (BB-8 is already in there fixing things to get K-2SO, so this is no extra trouble.)

Steve Rogers absolutely never gets Captain America in "Which Avenger Are You?" quizzes, although one time he got Falcon and Sam got Captain America, and Steve bragged about this for a week straight.

Meanwhile, Bruce Wayne always gets Batman on Justice League ones. He would suspect Oracle of somehow cheating to make sure this happens, except he knows enough about computers to know that this isn't actually possible, and also it even happened on the air-gapped, built-for-purpose machine with the quiz he wrote himself for the sole purpose of not getting Batman because this is becoming a security issue, Alfred. (Clark Kent does not take them unless they have Lois Lane as a superhero option, and if they do have Lois Lane as an option he always gets Lois Lane.)

What would your favorite characters get if they took character quizzes? Do you agree with my assessments? If they're famous enough that they are an option the quiz, or if they are nerdy enough that someone in their friend group made it for their friend group, that is extra fun. Bonus if you discuss why or write out some of the actual quiz questions and which option they pick!

Comments

[jjhunter]

My hindbrain's immediate answer: I dunno. We should do a whole series reread with a special focus on this question (and maybe writing the personality quiz) to find out!

Me: DAMMIT BRAIN. We just started listening to the immediate sequel to 'Master and Commander'. Trying to read two series at once is the kind of nonsense that leads to past-history Rivers of London fic that you don't have brainspace to write right now. We have to rehome some of these plot bunnies before you keep spawning new ones!

[melannen]

Look, I made the mistake last week of alternating RoL re-read with Benjamin January re-read, and now I want nothing more in the world but the fic where Peter has to go to a ball thrown by the social leaders of the demi-monde but gets his demi-mondes mixed up and ends up at a Blue Ribbon Ball in 1840s New Orleans instead and time-travel requires equal exchange so Abishag Shaw gets dropped on Nightingale in his place, but I got distracted by trying to figure out which jazz tunes Peter might know well enough to play from memory but that wouldn't screw up the timeline too badly if he played them for Hannibal, so I have no sympathy for you.

also I still really want Ancillary Folly to exist. ("Molly" is short for "Mercy of Folly" right)

[sholio]

... I feel as if Shaw would handle 21st-century London surprisingly well, all things considered (he seems like that kind of person) -- probably better than 21st-century London would handle Shaw. Although Nightingale is also a taking-things-in-stride kind of person. And Shaw is probably as much like his idea of a typical American as anyone can possibly be ...

It's not the buddyfic we asked for, but it's the buddyfic we deserve.

Meanwhile I think Peter's biggest problem with screwing up the timeline would not be Hannibal, but Rose. If she ever finds out he's a time traveler, heaven help him (there will be no end to the questions! The worst part is that as a science-minded person himself, he actually knows the answer to a lot of them!), and even if she doesn't know, she'd be following him around constantly (baby in tow), spying on him suspiciously and trying to figure out what in the hell is up with him.

[melannen]

Oh, Rose is the active problem there, definitely, but he does actually know better that to tell her things, and if he can resist Bev he can probably resist Rose. Probably. Possibly even Rose and Chloe working together.

Hannibal attended Casterbrook just long enough before they mutually agreed his talents lay elsewhere to know not to ask anything, but also he is the man who reminds Peter too much of his father except without all the things that always came between him and his father, and the one he wants to break the timeline for, as a gift, especially since even Newtonian magic can't cure TB.

Hannibal and Ben, because he doesn't know how to react to Ben, except that he knows just enough history to know a little bit of what Ben must have fought through to be who he is, and he knows the awe in Ben's face when Peter explains he's a wizard of the Folly (and that people always say he looks kind of like the President of the USA) isn't for him, really, it's for the things that people like Ben worked for, but he has no idea how to, like, tell him any of that. Except music. And he's almost as bad at music as talking about feelings anyway. But.

Meanwhile, yeah, as soon as Molly forces Shaw into a bathtub and steals all his clothes, he and Nightingale get on just fine, and he gets his feet under him in the 21st century pretty quick; it's not that much more future shock than washing up in New Orleans was, and Nightingale knows all about future shock anyway. Best buddy cop story, Belgravia doesn't know what hit it.

[sholio]

as soon as Molly forces Shaw into a bathtub and steals all his clothes

OMG, if you write nothing else from this AU, please write that scene. PLEASE. XD

And agreed on Peter and Ben, and Peter and Hannibal. OUCH. Especially this:

even Newtonian magic can't cure TB.

*weeps on keyboard*

[melannen]

Shaw grew up in Appalachian Kentucky, so I am pretty sure he knows something of folks like Molly, and he knows that rule #1 is don't piss them off if it's avoidable, so even that probably isn't that dramatic a scene, and consists of Molly pointing to the bathtub and Shaw gulping and saying "Yes, ma'am."

(When he appears back in New Orleans in clean, well-mended clothes and smelling of boughten soap, now that's a dramatic scene.)

Really the main thing he has trouble with is that it's hard to get real chewing tobacco and he wouldn't dare chew it in Molly's domain even if he could find some.


...yeah the weeping is like reason #3 I'm not actually going to write this.